26th August: Dragon pools and Dragons

This morning we went to the Dragon pool park and on our way around exploring we were brought into a little house and given a lecture by the Dongba. He is one of only 7 left in the world. Head of the Naxi tribe. Much nicer than the Nazi’s I must say. We got tea and all. Then he tried to sell us some paper that he had written on. Too pricey for our budget….and completely shite! Rice paper with a drawing of a horse. A 7 year old child with no arms would have done better. He’s some business man.

We got on the 3.00 bus that would bring us to the entrance of the tiger leaping gorge. This is a trek we were going to take on. At the start of the trail is a place called Jane’s guesthouse. That’s where we stayed for the night before the long walk.
Jane greeted us at the gate and instantly took a shine to me. She had very good English but poor Jane needed a shave more than I did! Her jumper could have done with a soak in a bowl of Vanish Oxy action too. And her teeth….well, there was one and that didn’t look like it was going to stay put for much longer. All in all she was lovely!

Jane made us a cracking good meal while the insane grandmother of the house tried to sell us random stuff behind Jane’s back. Flashlights, plates, plants, you name it, she had it. Totally insane!

25th August

We had a bit of a lie in today before discovering that we were in a gorgeous town. Something we had missed last night in our drunken states. The streets are cobbled and lined with lanterns. It’s like a step back in town. No cars. Barely a bicycle.

As we were exploring the town, we realized that we were a bit of a rarity in Lijang. Everyone was staring at us. A tour group arrived and started taking pictures of us. I felt like I was famous, but I didn’t like it. Some even came and put their arms around us and posed for their friend to take a picture.
In the evening we went down to the square where there was a bit of a cheilí going on. It was great craic, even if the dancing was a bit monotonous. In, out, around, in, out, around, in…..

24th August: Panda, Panda!!

Got up at the crack of dawn and got on a rickshaw out to the Panda sanctuary. It was absolutely brilliant! We made it in time to see the baby panda’s being fed, and at this stage they were fighting and running around. (They sleep for most of the day!) It was like watching a comedy show with all the young pandas punching each other and falling off of trees!
Then came one of Fi’s highlight of the trip…..

It’s a red lesser panda and she got to hold it. The smile lasted for at least three days. ‘It was just soooooo cuddley!’ She wanted to take one home but was firmly reminded that these are endangered species and wouldn’t adapt well to being in a field in Wexford with a herd of cattle.

After the panda sanctuary we went to a park which advertised what looked like a ghost house. Myself and Rich went in…. It was one of the most bizarre moments of my life. It was actually terrifying because there were no things jumping out at you, or nothing making sudden noises. You just walk along a real bomb shelter tunnel not knowing what to expect. There is nothing in the tunnel! So strange, but also terrifying. I don’t exactly know why?????

We headed to the airport and were held up for 4 hours with a massive thunderstorm. We passed the time by playing drinking games and were pretty tipsy getting on the plane. It was only an hour flight but when we landed Rich was fast asleep. We tried to wake him but he just kept cuddling up to his pillow against the window. The Chinese had no idea what was going on. They thought he was sick, or unconscious.

In the end, the captain had to come back and see what the fuss was about. Eventually he awoke, to the captain and 5 stewardesses speaking to him in Chinese. He simply looked at them, turned around, and went back to sleep. I’ve never laughed so much in my life. I wish I had my camera on me.

When we eventually got to the terminal (shed), our bags were waiting for us in a pool of beer. Our cans had all burst! We got in a taxi and headed to our hostel which was impossible to find. The tiny streets were deserted and it was pitch black. After an hour of wandering we somehow came across it. Bed!

23 August: Back to Chengdu

Up early this morning, we got on the rickety bus back to Chengdu. An 8 hour, fun filled trip. The bus driver started playing, by what can only be described as musical chairs. Whatever was being shouted was because of us ‘Westies’. We had no clue what was going on. We just stayed put and ignored the chaos and gave dirty looks to the people trying to throw us off the bus. We were leaving on this bus no matter what. When calm was restored and the bus started on it’s way Rich ended up sitting next to an American girl who literally talked non-stop at him for the entire 8 hours. At one stage he had fallen asleep and she still talked while looking out the window. Dead serious!

We all went through various stages of naps while keeping our Bibles close. If they went missing, we would be “@%$ed! On my left a whole family had squeezed into two seats and the smallest daughter puked for at least 7 hours and 59 mins. Did it smell? Did it what.
When we arrived back in Chengdu we went straight to the train station to get tickets for tomorrow but they were sold out. We nearly cried, as we would have to spend another day in HELL(Chengdu).

Back at the hostel, we managed to book really cheap plane tickets for tomorrow night out of this place. It felt like we had been told we were released from prison! Although, we would have to spend the next day passing the time away.

22 August: Recovering

Rich and Fi headed to the unreal Huanglong Park for the day while I spent the day in Songpan recovering. After holding down a bit of food I went exploring the little village. I missed out on the main spectacle of the day though when I was shown the pictures of Huanglong Park.

Apparently, it was unbelievable with lakes of 17 different colours.

It’s on top of a mountain up at 4000 metres and you can buy oxygen masks if it gets too tough to breath. Most of the (chain-smoking) Chinese were carting a couple of them around.

Back in Songpan I was admiring how well the locals keep their picturesque little town. Even the bins are themed!

21st August: He’ll be riding six white horses

As the sun rose over the mountains I was still alive, barely. It was decided that I had acute mountain sickness and had to get back to lower ground as soon as possible. So our trip in Tibet was cut short as we had to double back and head back into China. On our way we entered a tiny village on the top of a mountain with a Buddhist monastery. Myself and Rich were allowed in but Fi, being female was not allowed to tempt the monks.
They were all praying and had to run back to their dorms when they saw us. They try not to make any contact with the outside world at all. Apparently teenagers come from hundreds of miles away to study on this mountain retreat. Total isolation. Although suffering from altitude sickness and extreme sunburn, I managed to appreciate the unbelievable scenery of totally unspoiled land. Totally deserted. We eventually made it back to Songpan where I swallowed a double dosage of antibiotics.

We found a room for the night in some house. It was filthy but cheap. Actually it was disgusting. The antibiotics sent me straight to sleep.

20th August: Pie balds and Battys

The sound of horses hooves greeted us this morning as we woke up in the shed. The effect of the tablets has worn off and the diarrhea is back even worse than before. The lads were outside. Ready to go, with all the supplies up on other horses. Coming out into the daylight I realized that we have a name for these type of people back home. Just have a look at the photo:

Yes, knackers, pavees, tinkers, travelers, itinerants, whatever you want to call them, that’s what they are. Total cowboys. So we all awkwardly climbed on board our respective horses….when I say horses they were more like sheep. They don’t respond to reins or kicks or shouting. They are more a breed of sheep. They follow each other and that’s that.

So we headed for the hills, out of Songpan. Up and up we went into the mountains on a little trail. For miles we traveled, our behinds becoming numb.

Trying to get into to Tibet unnoticed is relatively easy, as there are so many mountain trails, although these are at huge altitudes so they are dangerous enough. It took nothing out of the horses who seemed pretty well able for the journey. For me though I was on my last legs. Every 20 mins I had to jump off and head for a bush. I’ve never felt so bad in my life! I’ve eaten plenty dodgy Indian food but this is 10 times worse. I got weaker and weaker as the day went on.

We stopped at 4200 meters to set up camp for the night. This is about half way up mount Everest and we were all starting to feel it. Breathing was becoming a lot more difficult and this was not helping my situation. I needed some antibiotics as soon as possible.
As dinner was being served the guides started opening their bottles of fire wine. This is absolutely lethal stuff. I don’t know what percentage alcohol it is but after about an hour all their noses were pumping blood. They didn’t even bat an eyelid, just kept supping away on the stuff as they broke into song every now and again, when they weren’t panned out on the ground. Tough as nails these guys!

As one by one they passed out by the fire, we headed to our tents. A night of hell was about to begin for me

For the entire night I was vomiting….from both ends, and lost all strength. In the end I just lay on the wet grass wishing I would die.

19th August: Out of the Chengdu, into the fire

We decided to get out of Chengdu as quickly as possible, since there is nothing much to do or see so we went to the bus station and got on a bus to Songpan. The drive took a long 10 hours along a road meandering up the mountains on the outskirts of Tibet. We were at a dead stop for an hour at one stage because a boulder had fallen down, squashing a truck and the driver.

We did stop for lunch halfway but we were quickly hunted back onto the bus by the driver because we were being attacked by a swarm of monster size bees. There were a few casualties but luckily we escaped.

Arriving in Songpan we felt much better. It’s a gorgeous little town with old walls surrounding it. The people are really friendly and make an effort to try and put a few English words together.
We didn’t want to pay for a visa and guide into Tibet as it costs a fortune so we talked a few lads with horses into taking us across the mountains, bypassing any checkpoints. We made arrangements and got supplies for tomorrow’s journey. It will be a three day horse trek.

We bedded down in a really desperate hotel for the night. It was a converted bus station with cardboard partitions and no ceilings. Filthy is not the word. The toilets and showers would make a slurry pit look clean. Holding your nose was not enough as the smell seemed to seep through your skin anyway. That night we had our first visit from Mr. Rat!

18th August: Thomas the tank engine has evolved

We woke a bit late today and had to be at the airport for a flight to western China. We trundled with our backpacks through the humidity and got to the train station that would bring us to the airport. This train is special however! It’s a magnetic levitation train. MagLev for short.

As the train pulled into the platform everyone had their cameras out taking pictures. The oooohh’s started to change to eughhhhhh’s as the train got closer. You see, the front of the train was entirely covered in blood and feathers from all the birds it hits on it’s high speed journey.

We boarded the train and it took off as we watched the speedometer ahead of us. We topped at a speed of 431km/hr. We were flying it! We were passing cars on the motorway as if they were at a standstill. 8 minutes later we were at the airport.

Our flight took us to a town called Chengdu. On the map Chengdu looks like a town, but in fact it has 4.3 million people squashed into the place. Here is where China really began. Toilets have become a mere hole in the ground. It’s dirty, full of smog and the poverty is more evident. We are now the only westerners in a 200 mile radius and Chinese is the only language.

We got the number 16 bus to the city and it dropped us in the middle of nowhere. No taxi’s would pick us up and no one could understand us at all. It was beginning to get dark with no sign of accommodation. Eventually a taxi stopped and brought us to a guesthouse. It was rotten. At this stage we did not care. The city is eerily quiet at night and doesn’t seem too safe….at all.

We called it an early night.

17th August: Not quite Nessun Dorma

Woke up this morning with no hangover. Diaharea kicked in 30 mins later. It got worse and worse. I managed to drag myself to an art museum to see a black and white photo expedition from a Mongolian photographer from the 70s. It was amazing stuff. Leaving the museum, I had to do the chicken run back to the hostel to stop myself from soiling my pants. At this stage I was as weak as water and was sick of being harassed by students who wanted to practice their English with me.

After a shower and a lie down I was feeling a bit better so we headed to see a Chinese opera.
It was unbelievable. The most surreal thing I’ve ever seen. The costumes were unreal and the characters didn’t disappoint either. I think the story went something like this.

Prince is killed by wife who is killed by his brother who marries her sister and elopes before she takes revenge and is in turn killed by the god of acrobatics, who is a cat.

By half time (3 hours later) we couldn’t take the shrill voices of the transvestite actors anymore so we had to leave.